The saddest thing that can happen to an individual is suicide.  It diversely affects people who are close to the victim and to anyone who  came into contact with the person, even the people who may try hard to help them.  People usually need to find a scapegoat. However I find  that in the majority of cases, once the decision has been made, not much could have been done to save them,  not by the family, friends or even the medical profession. The reasons can seem slight to other people and not worth even thinking about yet the same thoughts in another person can be catastrophic.  Suicide can be a welcome relief for the person as it does release them from the thing they cannot get away from by using conventional methods.  I was once told  “there is always another way” but that is not correct, sometimes for the person concerned it is the only way that they can see.

Suicide, to the person left behind  is probably the worst feeling they will ever feel.  However it does help to think that great person can now rest their mind and escape from the torture they were feeling.  After all, don’t we all seek peace in our lives.  Yes it might seem extreme however if the person made that decision we have to respect it as we respect the person. Shouldering guilt will not help anyone, indeed it could harm someone, so we must try and seek peace whilst we are here and live our lives as they would want us to. I have heard people say “that’s taking the easy way out”.  Believe me it is not.  I believe the person to have been very strong and true to themselves right to the end. As in any situation the sooner that you can forgive the better.  Forgive them, yes of course, but just as important forgive yourself,  as there is no blame. Forgive all.

Regardless of what I have said, the people left behind will be devastated.

If you are the person contemplating suicide find someone to talk to.  There are groups who can help disentangle things and might even come up with something you haven’t thought of.  You can only gain by seeking someone to chat to.

Try chatting to a family member, a partner, a pastor, a mate or a group like Lifeline or SANE.  This might sound daft, but even a pet can listen and give comfort. Try taking a look at this link, to see that you are not alone in feeling as bad as you do and you can get help.

If it would help, you can send a comment to say how you feel here.

For support and information about depression, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or SANE helpline on 1800 187 263.